occurred and my cherished aircraft plummeted into a stand
of trees. My faith has been sorely tested by this experience.
Do you have any insight for me?
-Marion in Mayrair, MA
Two out of three ain't bad!
What's the difference between a two BIT digital
array processor and a four BIT microprocessor memory mapper?
Paul Shrenk from PA
Hi, it's me, Tommy Smith. How are you and your family! My
little brother's skin graft is healing nicely, but we had
to throw his catcher's mask away.
I have a question about those things called debonders. Do
they really work? Like if our cat's front paws accidentally
got glued to his scratching post, would that debonder stuff
get him loose? Or how about if Nancy Papanak's lunch box won't
open, would debonder help get the lid off? One more thing,
is it safe to use on hair?
These are all hypopotical questions. I hope you understand.
It's not that I would ever have to use this debonder stuff.
I was just curious.
-Your friend, Tommy Smith
P S. Did you know that ear wax and super-glue make smoke?
Debonders really do work. In fact, if you had some, you
could have removed the piece of pizza that was stuck to the
envelope before you mailed your letter to me.
If you're through with the nonsense in this month's column,
could we get on to something serious?
We are losing far too many flying fields and something has
to he done about it. So far, you've done nothing to help.
Isn't it about time you got off your duff?
-Outraged in Oneonta, NY
Hey, if you can't remember where you put your flying field,
don't blame me. I haven't lost anything since 1963, if you
don't count my ex-wife Gloria, so l just can't relate to you
absent-minded types who'd lose your hats if they weren't nailed
down. Try dropping bread crumbs next time you leave the field,
and maybe you'll be able to find your way back.
Horse's Hind Quarters:
Several issues ago, I told you that I had lost the wing of
my Byron F-86 ducted fan aircraft and asked you where I could
get a replacement. You said not to bother, and that I could
just use the fuselage as a leaf blower.
Sounded okay to me, so I tried it. Actually worked pretty
well, if the truth be known. But my courteous neighbors and
our local police authorities have informed me that I have
violated several noise ordinances, and that my fine will exceed
I oughta take it right out of your hide.
-Clyde in Goshen, MI
Sorry, I can't hear you. Some jerk next door is cleaning
his driveway with an F-16.